Ickle Firsties
by Padfoot Hoshi
Summary: James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter's first year at Hogwarts. I'm so original! There's not really much more you can say about it, so please read... and review.
1. Leaving Home

**Ickle Firsties – Chapter One**

**Leaving Home**

AN: This should be a good one for all you fans of 'Yet Another Harry Potter Story'.  I've been dying to do this fic for ages, and while Chapter Four of YAHPS is at the beta's, I thought I'd take the opportunity to write.  Please review!

          **James Potter could hardly contain his excitement.  His parents were in their sitting room now, talking in hushed voices about a letter.  Oh, but it was not just any letter.  It was a letter from that- excuse the word- _magical place that his brother Rob had disappeared to seven years earlier.  Although James had been very young while his brother was at school (he was only eleven now), he could still vividly remember his brother's visits over the summer holidays, speaking of his friends and the spells that he had learned and Quidditch- could a school really have a Quidditch team?  There was no town team in Fuellis, but if there was, James was sure he'd be on it.  When, on the rare occasion that Rob found time to play with the brother so far behind him in age, the experience was full of encouraging smiles and "Why can't he be on our team?  He's better than Poudrier!"  And now it was his turn to play Quidditch and make real friends (other than the exceedingly bland Muggles that lived in Fuellis) and learn spells!  He fought hard not to burst into the sitting room and demand to be taken to buy his school supplies that very instant._**

He pressed his ear against the door, every one of his senses alert, listening.  His ear caught a creak the wall, the scratch of nail upon flesh, and muffled voices speaking, but he couldn't make out what they were saying.

It was agonizing; he wanted them to come out and tell him that he was free, that he could go.  He gave up trying to hear what they were saying and slumped down on the floor, running his finger absentmindedly along the lead-lined crack in the door, the crack which ran diagonally from the floor to the place where the handsome wood of the door met the edge of its frame, the crack for which he was responsible.  He grinned at the memory.  It had been three years ago, when he was eight…

**Flashback**

            "Robbie!"  cried James's mother, flinging her arms around her eldest son, who was going into his fifth year at Hogwarts.

"Mum," Rob gasped, patting his mother slightly on the back.  "You're choking me, Mum!"

"Yes," said Mrs. Potter, taking a step back to admire him.  "Well, I've baked fresh biscuits, and I've made tea…" she bustled off to the kitchen.

James's dad exchanged a much shorter and looser hug with Rob, and then joined his wife in the kitchen.

Rob shot James a grin, and drew a small bag out of his pocket.  He handed it to James.  Inside were some heavy oval-shaped spheres.

"What are they?" James had asked.

"Dungbombs," said Rob, exchanging another grin with his little brother.

"Wow!" exclaimed James.  "What do they do?  Can I put it in Mrs. Gregoria's flower bed down the street?"

"Er, I don't think that's a very good idea, James," said Rob.

"How do you set them off?" asked James anxiously.

"Drop them," Rob said.  "There's also a rumor that if you leave them sitting in one place for too long, they'll explode, but I'm not entirely sure if that's true…"

"Wow!" exclaimed James.  Looking back, what he did next seems very stupid, but you couldn't rewrite the past.  Well, you could, if you had a Time-Turner, but… that was beside the point.

James inserted his hand inside the bag and pulled out a Dungbomb.  Then he flung it at the door that he would be anxiously pressing his ear against in three years' time.  With an ear-shattering _boom, a small section of the door broke off._

            **End of Flashback**

            James continued running his finger along the crack, recalling with amusement the punishments that his parents had tried to give him, all of which he had thwarted spectacularly.

He was still running his finger along the crack, when he felt, for the first time, a small bit of imperfection in the otherwise smooth wood.  A splinter.

James began picking at the splinter.  At first, it offered resistance, but then pieces of the fine wood began to brake away.  At last, all that was left was a gash in the handsome wood so deep it was almost a hole in the wood.  James leaned back to admire his handiwork, and suddenly realized that the instant his parents exited the room, they would notice.  And he would be dead.

Then he spotted his mum's wand on the kitchen table.  "_Excellent," James murmured.  He could just do that repairing spell thing, and it would be fixed.  It would look better than ever, and it would give him good practice for school._

He got up and retrieved the wand.  Now, what was the incantation?  Reparo?  Repara?  Reparon?  Yes, that was it.  Reparon.

"_Reparon_!" cried James, swishing the wand perhaps a little more violently than was necessary.

Instead of repairing the gash in the door, James found himself being thrown backwards by the force that blasted the door off its hinges.  And who better to be standing on the other side of the wreckage than his mum and dad.

"Oops," he said, grinning sheepishly.  He stood up and brushed off the sawdust (was it sawdust?) that was all down his front.  He gave his wand back to his mum.

"_Scourgify_," she said, and the sawdust, or whatever it was, disappeared from James's robes.  She directed her wand at the door now.  "_Reparo."  The door repaired itself._

So it _was_ reparo, thought James, a horrible feeling rising in the pit of his stomach.  Would they allow him to go to school now, or would they make him wait another year?  The door had certainly been repaired easily, but his parents were far from happy.  They couldn't hold him back _now_, they had to let him go, they just _had_ to…

"What were you doing, James?" asked his father.

"Er," said James, trying to think of a good excuse.  "Practicing?"

At this, he though he saw the beginnings of a smile forming on his father's face, but if they were there, they disappeared as quickly as they had come.  Instead he raised his eyebrows.  "Practicing?"

"For, you know, school," James said.

"School," repeated his mum.  "And what makes you think that you are going to school?"

Fear settled inside of him.  "Well, that letter," he began shakily.  "It was for me, wasn't it?  About school, right?

"Well, can I read it?" asked James, a boyish grin spreading over his face, forgetting that he was going to be punished.

"First, I believe a punishment is in order," said his mum icily.

The grin fell from James's face.

James's mum and dad exchanged glances.  "No Quidditch in the backyard for the rest of the week, I think," said his father at last.  His mum nodded in agreement.

"Does- does that mean I can still go to school?" he asked.

"Of course," said his father, knowing what James didn't: school was as much a punishment as a reward.  "We weren't willing to delay your education just because you blasted the sitting door apart."

James smiled, alight with happiness, as his father handed him a thick parchment envelope with his name on it in green ink.

He was going to Hogwarts.

AN:  So, how was it?  Please review!!  You can flame me if you want to, but please have a good reason.  :D

                                                            --Juli


	2. The Hogwarts Express

Ickle Firsties

**Chapter Two – The Hogwarts Express**

**            J**ames was beside himself with elation.  It was September first.  The day he was leaving for Hogwarts.  He was to board the Hogwarts Express at eleven o'clock from Platform Nine and Three-Quarters at Kings Cross Station.  There was only one problem.

            It was nine fifteen.

            "Mum, can we go yet?" asked James for the umpteenth time.  He was checking his watch every few seconds now.  It was going so slowly he could have sworn it had stopped.

            "James, we'll be an hour and a half early if we leave now," his mum answered patiently.  She was trying not to laugh out loud at the sight of him.  He was sitting on top of his trunk right next to the door, and clutching his new wand (Mahogany, eleven inches, pliable) so tightly that it looked about to snap.

            "But we're taking the Muggle- whatever it is- cab thing, right?  Aren't those supposed to be really slow?" He looked so hopeful!

            "I think you'll just have to sit tight until ten thirty," said his mum, smiling sadly.

            Feeling slightly dejected, James opened his trunk and retrieved the _Standard Book of Spells, Grade One_, and immediately immersed himself in it.

***

            They stood between platforms nine and ten.  James was looking around anxiously, as if to see some sign of how to get onto Platform Nine and Three-Quarters.  He thought he saw a very stern woman and her son carrying an owl, but one minute they were there, and the next, they were just… not there.  Gone.

            "Dad, how do you get on there?  To Platform Nine and Three-Quarters, I mean?"

            "See that barrier," said his dad, pointing, but keeping his voice low all the same.  "Right between platforms nine and ten?"

            James nodded.

            "All you have to do is walk right through that barrier."

            If this would have sounded strange to anyone else, it made perfect sense to James.  In fact, he thought it was positively ingenious.  Perhaps it was because he had grown up in the wizarding world, and travelling through fireplaces and hurling yourself through what appeared to be a solid barrier seemed like perfectly sensible things to do.

            At any rate, James embraced the idea and said, "See you on Platform Nine and Three-Quarters!" to his parents, and ran headlong into the barrier.

            There was no crash.  Nothing.  It was like he had run through air.  But he had closed his eyes when he had started running, and he kept them closed and kept on running.  He could only assume (as he had his eyes shut) that he had been about to run onto the train tracks, because a strong arm was flung in front of him.

            "Take it easy, there, sonny," said the owner of the arm, a tall man with graying hair and very kind brown eyes.

            "Ah- okay- thanks- sorry," he panted.

            The man smiled.  "It's okay," he said.  "It is instinct to close one's eyes when one is running through something that looks so solid.  You just have to know when to stop."

            "Yeah, thanks," said James, after regaining some breath.  "Thanks a lot."

            At that moment, his parents emerged, his mum with the trolley that held his trunk.  James checked his watch.  Ten fifty-eight.

            He ran forward and gave each of his parents a hug.  His dad gave him a few Galleons and some Sickles.

            "What's this for?" asked James.  "You know I've already got money, in my trunk-"

            "Oh, it'll come in handy," said his dad, winking at him.

            Just then, the scarlet steam engine anchored on the tracks gave a loud whistle.  James gave a last smile to his parents, and joined the throng of students boarding the train.

***

            It didn't take long for a new student to figure out that most of the compartments were quite full, nearly all of their occupants older students who had known each other for quite a long time and were gabbling excitedly.

            At last, James found a compartment with only one other occupant, and took a seat kitty-corner from him.  Once again, to suppress his boredom, he took out a book (_A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration_) and began to read.

            The book couldn't hold his interest for very long, however, and he soon found himself shooting sideways glances at the other boy in the compartment, who was also reading.  Then he noticed that the other boy was doing the same thing to him.

            "What're you reading?" asked James at last.  The boy turned to glance at him, and James finally got a good look at him.  He was really very handsome, with a rounded face and dark brown, almost black hair, which was short enough so that one could say that he needed a haircut, yet long enough that you got the distinct impression that he wanted to keep it that way.

            "_One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi_," said the boy, rolling his eyes.  "And you?"

            "_A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration_," answered James, rolling his eyes back and grinning.  "I'm James, by the way.  James Potter."

            "Sirius Black," said the boy.

            Then, the door to the compartment slid open, and a plump witch driving a cart piled with sweets appeared.  "Would you like anything to eat, dears?" she asked.

            "Er- hang on one second," said Sirius.  He opened his trunk and began fishing around for some money.  James, however, now understood why his dad had given him some extra money.

            "What've you got?" he asked, showing her three Galleons and a Sickle.

            "Pumpkin Pasties, Cauldron Cakes, Licorice Wands, Chocolate Frogs, and Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans," replied the witch.

            "Argh!" cried Sirius suddenly.  "I can't find my money!"

            "It's okay, mate," said James.  "I'll get you something. But you'll owe me." He grinned.

            "Alright," said Sirius, who looked as though no one had offered him something this nice in about five years.  "Thanks."

            "Er, three Pumpkin Pasties, a Cauldron Cake, eight Chocolate Frogs, and one package of the Every Flavor Beans," ordered James.

            "Right you are, dears," said the witch.  James paid her, and she left.

            "Sho," said Sirius thickly, his mouth full of Pumpkin Pasty.  "What houshe do you reckon you'll be in?"

            "Dunno," said James as he spat out a green Every Flavor Bean.  "Yick.  Sorry.  I think my brother was in Raven-thing though, so I guess that's where I'll be.  My mum was in Puffybuff or whatever it is, though.  I forget where my dad was."

            "Yeah," said Sirius.  "I think I'll be in Slytherin, at least all the rest of my family was. I'll probably get wiped off the family tree if I'm not," he added, and gave a hollow laugh.  "My mum says Regulus- my younger brother, he's two years off of me- is a true Slytherin, but she's never said anything about me.  Regulus was always my parents' favorite.  How old's your brother?"

            "Eighteen.  He just got signed to the Alnwick Aviators, you know, the Quidditch team."

            "Quidditch player, eh?  You should hear our house-elf talk about Quidditch.  '_Barbaric sport, positively barbaric.__  Stupid fools, probably Mudbloods, too, going around on their broomsticks and hitting each other_…' He's right old, too, Kreacher.  Hopefully one of these days Aunt Elladora will come around and-" he made a swift cutting motion across his throat.

            James raised his eyebrows.  "You're not serious."

            Sirius nodded.  "Dead serious, mate.  It's an honor.  All of Kreacher's ancestors have their heads up on plaques in the downstairs hallway.  Creepy, but Kreacher deserves it.  He's a right pain in the-"

            "You're pure-blood, then, I'm guessing."

            "Yeah," said Sirius grimly.  He put on a high-pitched voice.  "_To be a Black is an honor, not a privilege.  See that Mudblood scum?  Filth.  Absolute filth.  You are lucky to belong to the House of Black_.  Yeah, right.  Got a lecture on that- only about three hours longer, mind- because I was playing tag with the Muggle kid across the street."

            "Ouch," James said sympathetically.  "We're pure-blood too, up until my great-great-great-great-grandmother or something, but my parents don't really give a darn whether someone's Muggle-born or not."

            After that, they quickly got off the subject, as it seemed to make Sirius a bit uncomfortable.  They spent the rest of the trip talking about their favorite Quidditch teams, bands, and daring each other to eat a mottled brownish-green Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Bean.

***

            By the time that the train was within five minutes of its destination, it was raining sheets outside, and the occasional bursts of thunder were so loud that it made several students jump.  Then, at long last, the train pulled into Hogsmeade station, and students began to disembark.

            As one older girl pulled her cloak a little more tightly around her, she said to her friend, "I feel so bad for the first-years!  I wouldn't want to be crossing the lake in these conditions!"

            "What'd you reckon?" James asked Sirius as they got off the train.  "D'you really think they'll make us cross the lake? Don't tell me they're making us swim!"

            "Doubt it," said Sirius.  "More likely we'll have to row a boat or something.  Just hope we don't have to use a spell- I'm no great shakes at magic yet."

            "Neither am I," said James, recalling the "reparon" incident as he put up the hood of his cloak.

            "Firs' years!" called a very loud voice over the crowd.  "Firs' years ov'r this way, please!"

            Sirius and James followed the sound, and were almost immediately confronted with a man every bit as large as his voice.  He must have been at least nine and a half feet tall, with a bushy black beard and eyes that were positively tiny in comparison with his face.

            "Firs' years!" he continued to call.  "Ahright, got ev'rybody now?  Okay then.  My name's Rubeus Hagrid, an' I'm the keeper of the keys and grounds here at Hogwarts."  He was explaining this while walking them to the edge of a large lake.  It was black in the stormy weather, and it looked frighteningly deep.

            "Okay, now, no more'n four to a boat!" Sirius and James managed to get into the same boat, along with a kid with greasy black hair and a hooked nose and another kid who looked like he could use nothing more than a good night's sleep.  All four of them were feeling rather nervous at the prospect of crossing a fathoms-deep lake during a vicious thunderstorm, though not all of them were showing it.

            At this point, Hagrid tapped the side of his boat with a pink umbrella, and the small fleet began to glide steadily across the lake.

            "What's your name?" James asked the boy with the hooked nose, who was perhaps the most frightened one among them.

            "S-severus Snape," stuttered the boy, shivering from a combination of cold and nerves, never taking an eye off the pitch-black sky above them.  "What's y-yours?"

            "I'm James, and this is Sirius," said James.  He then turned his gaze on the other boy in their boat.  "Who're you?" he asked him.  But he never found out who the other boy was, because at that moment, lightning shattered the sky, followed immediately- or perhaps nearly at the same time- by an ear-splitting crack of thunder.  Severus Snape let out a very audible whimper and hunkered down in the boat.

            "_Snivellus_," James whispered to Sirius, and they both cracked up.  Their fun was disrupted, however (and maybe this was a good thing, as Severus had heard them and was beginning to look murderous in spite of his fear) by the gamekeeper.

            "'Kay, we're almost there now- righ' 'round this bend here- welcome to Hogwarts School!"

            "Oooooooooooh," chorused the first years.  "Wowwwwwwww!"  And it was for good reason, too, because the castle looming in front of them was unlike any they had ever seen- and probably ever would.  It covered several acres of land, filling space with wall upon wall, room upon room.  There were turrets and towers to fill even the most demanding adventurer's needs, and with one look, you could tell what didn't need to be said.  You could live your entire life in this castle, and never know all of its secrets.

            Soon enough, they reached the edge of the lake and stepped out of their boats.  Another quick glance around could tell you that the grounds could be just as interesting as the castle itself; there were plenty of trees to plop down under in better weather, a dark forest filled with magical creatures (though the first years didn't know this yet) that looked at least as menacing as the lake, and a large willow tree near the edge of the forest.  It was this tree that peaked Sirius's interest.  He stood staring at it for a bit, and saw one of the forest's trees sway in the wind, close to the tree.  And- was it just his imagination?- he saw the willow tree hit it back.  He pondered this for a moment, until James pulled on the sleeve of his robes and dragged him along so that they were in line with the rest of the group.

            "James," said Sirius.  "That willow tree near the forest.  Did you see it?"

            "Yeah," replied James, gazing around at the walls of the room they had just entered.  "So?"

            "A tree near it sort of- swayed.  In the wind.  And the willow tree _hit it back_."

            James stared at him.  "You're delirious, Sirius," he said finally (AN: And I did _not_ mean that as some sort of weird rhyme.  I pronounce Sirius SIReeus.  Not SEEreeus.).  "You're tired, hungry, and cold.  Trees don't hit other trees."  But even as he said this, he had trouble believing it.  There was a definite aura of magic in this place, and something told him that maybe it _could_ be possible for trees to hit other trees.  Unlikely, yes, but possible.

            "_What_?" cried Sirius suddenly.

            "I didn't do it!" James said automatically.

            "No, not you," said Sirius.  "Him." He pointed to the fourth boy that had been in their boat.  "He was staring at us."

            The boy was now chewing his lip nervously and avoiding their gaze.

            "Git," said James.  He was about to add something much worse, but they had reached the top of the stairwell they had been walking up, and a stern-looking witch with her hair in a tight knot at the back of her head was standing next to Hagrid.

            "Thank you, Hagrid," said the witch.  "I'll be taking them into the preparation chamber."

            "Righ' you are, Professor McGonagall," said Hagrid, and set off through a door to the right of them.

            "Well, first years," said Professor McGonagall, leading them into a stone room.  "The Sorting shall begin momentarily.  I suggest that you take this opportunity to freshen yourselves up a bit."

            Most of the first years were looking nervous at the prospect of a Sorting Ceremony, but James didn't care what the Sorting Ceremony held in store for him.  He was just happy to be there.

____________________________________________________________

            AN: Thank you sosososo much to everybody who reviewed!!  Coming next chapter: Remus, Peter, and a new Sorting Hat song!  I hope you'll excuse my bad poetry….  Please review!

                                                                                    --Juli


	3. New Gryffindors

**Ickle Firsties**

**Chapter Three – New Gryffindors**

         The new first years scuffled into the great hall.  In front of them was a shabby hat sitting on a stool.  From what Professor McGonagall had told them in the preparation chamber, James knew that it was the Sorting Hat.

         "What does it do?" asked a girl who had earlier been staring avidly at Sirius.  Then, as though the Hat had heard her, its brim opened up like a mouth, and it began to sing.

_What do you see when you look at me?_

_A normal hat, at first glance?___

_Well, I can tell you things that would make your small feet dance!_

_For I can see inside your head_

_There's nothing you can hide from me_

_I will know your darkest secrets, fears, and wonders_

_So try me on and see!_

_I'll place you where you belong_

_In this noble castle_

_One of Houses four_

_You'll feel more like yourself once done_

_Than ever before!_

_One House for each founder_

_One House for each whim_

_One House for each blunder_

_One House for each sin_

_Hufflepuff valued loyalty,_

_Joyfulness,_

_And hope_

_But she also valued equality_

_She'd teach even the dopes_

_Slytherin, however_

_Held different values at heart_

_Pure-blood_

_Cunning_

_Sneakiness_

_Were all piled on his cart_

_Gryffindor liked those similar to he_

_Who possessed true bravery_

_Nerve_

_And chivalry_

_Ravenclaw, however_

_Had yet another opinion_

_She liked those of intelligence,_

_Wit_

_And learning_

_But not of spirit grim_

_Between these four people_

_You're sure to find your place_

_To learn and talk and make friends_

_All at your own pace_

_So try me on!_

_There's no need to worry now_

_You're in my hands, young geniuses_

_To go where great destinies abound!_

         As the Sorting Hat finished its song, the Great Hall burst into applause.  James couldn't exactly see why, as the song had some major lyrical flaws, but nevertheless, it _was_ a hat.

         Professor McGonagall then conjured a piece of parchment with her wand.  It presumably held the names of all the first years.  And the Sorting had begun.

           The first person, a girl called Ginger Alumis, walked forward towards the stool that bore the Sorting Hat, every inch of her body shaking.  She picked up the Hat, sat down, and put the Hat on her head.

          There was a moment's silence, then-

          "RAVENCLAW!" yelled the Hat.

          "Well," said James, trying to keep his nervousness from showing.  "That wasn't totally horrible.  No explosions, or, you know, other things."

         "Right," replied Sirius.  "Can't be too bad.  I mean, she's still alive."  He was even more nervous than James, due to the fact that his last name started with a B.

         "Apaydin, Christopher," said Professor McGonagall, and a tall boy with coffee blond hair walked over to the stool and placed the Hat on his head.

         "Well, you won't be dead," said James, trying to make his friend feel better, as "Avellone, Michael" became the first Slytherin.  "Humiliated, maybe, but not dead."

         Sirius gulped and nodded, and after Alexander Bates was Sorted into Hufflepuff, Professor McGonagall said, "Black, Sirius," and Sirius walked uneasily up to the stool.  The girl who had been staring at him earlier let out a very audible, dreamy sigh.

        "Oh, shut up," muttered James under his breath.  He crossed his fingers behind his back.  _Please let Sirius be in my House, please__…._

        James saw Sirius frown.  _Please let him be in my House, please, please, please…._

        And then, a minute later, the hat shouted "GRYFFINDOR!", and Sirius became the first to sit at the table at the far left of the Great Hall.

        He lived!  Was James's initial thought as Sirius sat down.  But then it dawned on him that it was much more boring to watch the Sorting without someone next to you, sharing your nervosa.  Well, the boy next to him, who was round-faced and pink-skinned, seemed close to tears, and kept shuddering violently, but James found himself thinking that Sirius was much less of a wimp.

        So, after Sirius got Sorted, James found his attention wandering, and only caught a few names of his year-mates ("Choubal, Delia", Sirius's admirer; "Derks, Riley", a boy with glasses that seemed to take up his entire face, even larger and rounder than James's own).  He looked around the great hall, and spotted a congregation of ghosts- they must've been ghosts, from what Rob had told him, they looked like them.  Every time a ghost was sorted into a House, a ghost would usually go over and congratulate them.  Sirius got a pat on the back from one of them, and by the way he winced, James could tell that it wasn't a good feeling.  The ceiling in the hall was also fascinating, because just before you heard a clap of thunder, you saw a bolt of lightning flash across it.  At first, James surmised that the ceiling was made of glass or some other see-through material, but then he remembered the outside view of the castle, and if he was standing where he thought he was standing, there was a room above him, so that couldn't be right.  He came to the conclusion that it was bewitched.

        James turned his attention back to the Sorting, where the Sorting Hat was now Sorting Katie Leiser, who ended up in Ravenclaw.  Next was a boy called Remus Lupin, who James immediately recognized as the fourth boy in his boat.  He had light brown hair flecked with dark brown highlights, and very kind brown eyes, though now that he could see him in better daylight, James saw that there were bags and dark circles under them.

        Next, there came Martin, Alexa ("SLYTHERIN!"), Kevin Noreg ("RAVENCLAW!"), and Alessandra Piatro ("HUFFLEPUFF!").  The next name apparently belonged to the shuddering boy next to James, for he got up and walked over to the stool to meet his fate.  His name was something Petti-something… okay, James wasn't really listening, so he didn't know the name.  Then it dawned on James.  Petti-something?!  He was probably next!

        He ran a hand through his hair, which he tended to do both when he was nervous and showing off (which he did a lot).  He wished that he had listened to Professor McGonagall and "freshened himself up" in the preparation chamber instead of talking with Sirius.  Too late now.  He wondered hurriedly how stupid he looked.

        "GRYFFINDOR!" shouted the Hat, and Pet- oh, whatever-his-name-was sat down next to Remus Lupin.  That baby?  Gryffindor?  James found himself wondering.  Argh!!  I'm next!

        But, to James's great relief, he wasn't next.  Jenna Pochtarev, he thought, should be made a saint.  Even if she only prolongs the agony.

        Jenna Pochtarev's Sorting went too quickly.  And this time there was no one to prolong the agony.

        "Potter, James!"

        James took a deep breath.  _Okay, Potter.  You can do it.  It's a stupid hat.  Even if it is in front of a thousand other kids.  Think _positive.  _You've been waiting for this your whole life._

        Bearing this last thought in mind, he walked over to the stool, and gingerly sat down and placed the hat on his head.  It was too large for him, and it slipped down over his eyes, but he closed them anyway.  Looking at the crowd made him feel rather queasy.

        _So_, said a small voice in James's ear.  Had he not been totally immobilized by fear, he would have jumped about three feet.  _James Potter.  It's been a long time- too long- yes, since I saw your brother.  He was quite smart, a quality that you too seem to possess.  Ravenclaw, perhaps?_

        I want to be with Sirius, thought James.  I want to be in Gryffindor.

        _Hmm, Gryffindor, eh? Said the Hat.  _Well, yes, there is bravery in your heart.  But there is also a cruel sense of humor there, a thirst for the despair of others_…_

        No!  James though desperately.  I do _not have a thirst for the despair of others… I want to be in _Gryffindor_, you filthy, stinking rag…_

        The Hat was laughing at him.  He couldn't hear it, but he was sure that it was true.  _A sharp tongue and a hot head, as well, but you want to be with your friend… that's loyalty… ah, well… if you insist…_

        "GRYFFINDOR!" roared the Hat.  Utterly relieved, James ripped the Hat off his head, and ran down to the table on the left and took a seat next to Sirius.  The ghost who had patted Sirius on the back put a hand on James's shoulder, and he knew instantly why he had winced, it was a terrible cold drowning feeling.  James dealt with this by turning around, forcing the ghost to take his hand of his shoulder, and saying "So you're the Gryffindor ghost- the one with a half a neck?"

        "Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington," said the ghost.

        "Oh, yeah!  Rob told me- what is it?  Nearly Headless Nick!" exclaimed James, and the first years and even some of the older students started laughing.

        "I would much prefer if you'd call me by my proper name," retorted the ghost, bristling.  "Or just Sir Nicholas would suffice-"

        "Hey, Nick!" yelled one of the second years.  "Show them your _neck!"_

        "Yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!" chorused the first years.

        "No, I would much rather not show them my- er- neck," said Nearly Headless Nick shortly.

        "Awww, come on!"

        Silently, and looking as though he'd rather do anything but, Nearly Headless Nick, undid his ruff, and his head fell limply to one side, revealing 7/8 of a stump.

        "Eeeeewwwww!" squealed the girls.  Nick redid his ruff, looking nothing short of disgruntled.

        Sirius and James exchanged glances, and mouthed, "Cool," in unison.

        They were so interested the ghost that they didn't notice that the Sorting ceremony had ended.  A tall man with a long graying beard had stood up at a tall table at the head of the hall.

        "If I could have a moment of your attention," he said, and his eyes glimmered behind their half-moon shields.  "I'd like to welcome you all back to Hogwarts, both those returning and new faces.  Before we begin our extravagant feast, I would like to extend a few notices, both to our older students and first-years."

        James sat up and listened attentively.  There was something about this man that you couldn't help but trust.  Albus Dumbledore.  Rob had spoken so highly of him.

        "Our caretaker, Apollyon Pringle, would like to inform you all that Dungbombs have been banned from the dormitories and corridors.  Also, _all_ students would do well to note that the forest on the grounds is out of bounds to students." James exchanged a frown with Sirius; he had been looking forward to exploring it.  "Students below sixth year are not allowed to check out books from the Restricted Section of the library without a signed note from a teacher.  And now I have only two words left to say to you:

        "Carpfaced drought."  The golden serving plates on the table filled instantly with food.  There was anything you could ever want after being excited, tired, cold, and nervous all in one.  Needless to say, all the first years dug in.

_______________________________________

AN: So, didja like it?!  Sorry it took me so long to get up… but thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter!  You guys rock!  And sorry I wasn't able to incorporate more of Remus and Peter in this chapter… there'll be more of them in next chapter, I _promise_!  ^ - ^ But if you have to flame me, don't do it because of the Sorting Hat Song, okay?  And (I got a review saying this) there's a reason why Dumbledore didn't tell the students about the Whomping Willow.  Remember Davy Gudgeon???  Lol… most of what I put in here is for a reason… anyways, please review!!

                                                                                                                                    --Juli


	4. First Night

**Ickle Firsties**

**Chapter Four – First Night**

AN: Okay, thank you all for waiting for me!!  I am soooooooooooooo sorry!!  I tried to write this at school, but one of my teacher says that fanfiction is not "suitable writing"… . FIRE HER!  Okay, anyway, on to chapter four!

            **T**he Gryffindor prefect led the first years up several flights of stairs until they finally came to a halt in front of a painting of a very large pink-clad woman.

            "Password?" asked the Fat Lady.

            "_Metamorphmagus_," said the prefect, and, to the first years' astonishment, the portrait swung open on its top hinges to reveal a large hole in the wall, leading to a sizeable circular room.

            "Well, don't just stand there!  Go in!" said the prefect rather loudly.

            "We- we can't," stammered a girl with light brown hair that fell to the middle of her back.

            "Move aside," muttered the prefect, pushing his way to the front of the group.  "_Stupid first years."_

            "What d'you reckon's going on?" Sirius asked.  James, jumping up and down, desperately trying to see over the heads of his peers.

            "No- clue," said James, coming back down to earth with a thud.

            "Here, move," said Sirius, pushing in front of James, and jumping.  James started to say something, like 'If I can't see it, then neither can you', but stopped, noting that Sirius was at least three inches taller than he; he had always been rather sensitive about his height.

            "Damn prefect," muttered Sirius.  "Can't see a bloody thing."

            "_Vadavi_!" yelled the prefect (AN: I know, I'm the cheapest of cheap, that means "go away" in Italian lol), and his cry echoed around the corridor.

            "What _was_ that?" asked the same girl with the light brown hair that was towards the front of the group.

            "That was Peeves," said the prefect heavily.  "He is a poltergeist, and, unfortunately, inhabits this castle.  That was a simple vanishing spell, which effectively-"

            But it was apparent that the first years didn't care about a vanishing spell, and they practically bowled the prefect over as they clambered for the hole behind the portrait.

            "Cool!" said James, after emerging from the hole, noting the merry fire on one side of the room and the various couches, chairs and tables.  "Is this the common room?"

            "Must be," Sirius replied absently.  "Hey, wouldn't it be awesome if we could catch that poltergeist?  And then we could lock it in an empty classroom with that crybaby Slytherin from the boat…."

            "Yeah, but I expect it'd be fairly hard to catch," James add.  "And we'd probably get covered in something unfavorable first."

            "First years," came the now disgruntled voice of the prefect.  "It is now time to retire to your dormitories.  Girls, go up the stairs to the left.  Boys, go up the stairs to the right."

            "But it's not even that late!" a few people protested, but the prefect, who gave off the distinct aura of someone who had just been trampled and was determined not for it to happen again, looked so menacing that the poor kid just squeaked, "Sorry, sir!" and scuttled up the stairs to her dormitory like a frightened house-elf.

            James and Sirius ambled up the slightly spiraling stairs and found themselves faced with a plaque on a door reading "First-Years".  James pushed the door open so hard it almost sprang off its hinges, and was met with an oval-shaped room containing five four-poster beds, with all of their trunks in a pile in the center of the room.

            "I call this one!" cried Sirius, grabbing his trunk and dragging it to the foot of a bed on the left side of the room.  "Mine!"

            "This one's mine, then!" called James, placing his own trunk at the foot of the bed to the right of Sirius's.  The chubby boy called Peter Pettigrew, who didn't exactly look like a Gryffindor, got the bed on the other side of Sirius, closest to the door; Remus Lupin got the bed on the other side of James, and immediately collapsed onto it; and Davy Gudgeon, who seemed to twitch every time he was spoken to, was next to Remus.

            Next to each four-poster was a chest of drawers, and everyone began to unpack, except for Remus, who said he'd do it in the morning.  James was just about to complain about how boring unpacking was, when he found something in his trunk that he was sure he had not put there.  It seemed to be made of air itself, silvery, shiny air.  It was feather light as he held it in his hands, and the smooth fabric flowed like a river as it rippled to the ground.

            "Hey James-" Sirius began, but stopped when he saw what James was holding.  "What is _that?"_

            "I dunno…" whispered James, the glow of the cloth mesmerizing him.  "I just found it in my trunk… must be a mistake…."

            "No, it's not," said Sirius, taking it from James.  "It's some type of a cloak- look- it's got a hood!  Try it on!"

            James obediently slid it on, putting up the hood so that it covered him completely.  Then he looked down, and pulled the cloak off as though it were made from the leaves of a poisonous plant.  "What the heck?!"

            "Whoa," said Peter Pettigrew.  "That must be an invisibility cloak!"

            "Yeah," said Davy Gudgeon, twitching as he spoke.

            "But _how_… how did I get it?  I didn't know we owned one of these!" said James, utterly bemused.

            "I dunno, mate," replied Sirius.  "But think of all the _possibilities!  We can go anywhere with this!  We can even check out that hitting tree out by the forest!"_

            "That tree doesn't hit," said Remus Lupin sleepily but firmly nonetheless.  "Where did you get that idea?  It's just a- just a regular tree."

            James and Sirius exchanged glances.  "I was almost sure-"

            "No.  It's a regular tree.  Forget about it."  James and Sirius exchanged another suspicious glance, but decided not to pursue the subject any further.

            Soon after, they all went to bed.  James, despite his excitement, fell asleep almost instantly.  He couldn't wait for his first day of classes.

____________________________________

AN: It's done!  ::sings:: DONEDONEDONE!  Please review!!  I'm sorry that it was so short, but I think next chapter's going to be longer.  Just a note, updates will usually be on weekends only.

                                                                                    --Juli


	5. The Whomping Willow

**Ickle Firsties**

**Chapter Five – The Whomping Willow**

AN: Okay, for future reference, updates will usually only be on weekends.  Also, I'm going to try and update this one more often!  Yay!  Lol… this chapter's part songfic, too, which is kinda weird for me.  Anyway, without further ado, on to the chapter!

            James and Sirius were engulfed in fits of laughter by the time they followed the rest of their year-mates down to the dungeons for their very first Potions class.  They had been envisioning Severus Snape as a fluffy purple bunny rabbit- which, according to them, was akin to his personality- bouncing around in Professor Flitwick's large bushy white wig.  They had accidentally found out about their Charms professor's hair, or lack thereof, when James had tried another one of incantations that sent a strong Arctic wind prancing around the classroom.

            By the time they entered the Potions dungeon, they were still laughing.  Then Sirius said something extremely, erm, _gross_ about McGonagall's trousers, and the pair laughed harder still.

            The Potions master slammed a baton- _why is he holding a baton? Several students wondered- into the palm of his right hand repeatedly.  The two dark-haired brats in the second row simply _refused_ to pay attention.  Well, he would find out who they were by taking attendance, pure and simple.  See if they were humiliated!  And once they were good and embarrassed, he would take twenty points from Gryffindor.  He smirked._

            "Hello, class," he began in the firm tone he always used with new students.  "My name is Maurus Nuray.  I am going to be your Potions teacher this year.

            "I will begin by taking attendance, and then lay down the rules for our classroom.  If you are intelligent enough to handle all that, we'll progress to the evaluation quiz, to see how much prior knowledge of potions and potion-making you possess."

            Several students groaned.  In fact, most of the class groaned, except for those two boys.  Professor Nuray smirked again.

            "Avellone, Michael!"

            "Here…."

            "Black, Sirius!"

            No answer.

            "Black, _Sirius_!"

            Still no answer.

            A red-headed girl in sitting near the two class disruptors in the second row reached around one of them and poked the longer-haired one with her quill.  "_Sirius!"_

            The quill's victim turned around.  "Huh?  How do you know my name?"

            The girl rolled her eyes.  "Unlike the two of _you-_" noticing the absence of Sirius's laughter, James turned around- "I pay _attention when our professors are taking attendance."_

            For some odd reason, James felt himself blushing.

            "Uhhh…" Sirius said.  James pointed to their professor, who was looking nothing short of irked, "here!"  He smiled good-naturedly.

            "Very well, Mr. Black," said Professor Nuray in his well-oiled voice (AN: So he's a Snape clone… so what?  :D).  "I hope you will pay more attention in the future-"

            "Sir, yes, sir!" Sirius said, mock-saluting his professor.  This earned titters from the Gryffindors.

            "SILENCE!" Professor Nuray shouted.  His left eye began to twitch violently as it usually did when he was extremely angry.  "Mr. Black!  Twenty points from Gryffindor for not paying attention and joking!  Mr. Potter!  Fifteen points from Gryffindor for helping him and laughing!  Miss Evans!  You helped him, too!  Ten points from Gryffindor!  And an additional five points from Gryffindor for the rest of you for laughing!"

            "Well, what're we at now, negative five hundred?" James asked Sirius a bit too audibly.

            "_Mr. Potter_!" thundered the Potions master, striding down between the rows to look James square in the face, his eye twitching threateningly.  "Your incessant talking has earned you a detention!"

            Sirius glanced from Nuray's very red face and twitching eye to the terrified look on James's own face, and burst into uncontrollable peals of laughter.  Mentally, Maurus Nuray burst.

            "_MR. BLACK!  YOU WILL JOIN YOUR FRIEND, MR. POTTER, IN DETENTION, HERE IN MY OFFICE, TOMORROW NIGHT!_" he held up his leather baton threateningly, and James and Sirius pretended to cower and attempted to hide grins.  (AN: This is rather reminding me of silent football… lol… Mr. Opera!  Mr. Cheese!  Stop laughing this _instant!  Lol… funfunfun….)_

            Nuray tried to remember what his guidance counselor had told him: take a deep breath; count to ten… _one, two, three, four, five_… ah, good enough.  He walked back up the aisle and stood at the front of the class once more.

            "Now, I will continue to take attendance…."

_Hey, schoolgirl in the second row_

_Teacher's lookin' over so I gotta whisper way down low_

            James quickly lost interest in the list of names that Professor Nuray was reading off and found himself staring at the red-headed girl.  Evans, the professor had called her… Evans, Evans, Lila?  No, that wasn't it.  But it started with an L.  Lucy?  Lulu?  Lana?

            "Evans, Lily," called Professor Nuray.  The girl raised her hand.

            "Present," she said clearly.  _Oh, Lily!  Well, I was right about part of it… it _did _start with an L… _man_, she's pretty…._

            Then she noticed James.  '_What are you looking at_?' she mouthed.

_Say woobopaloochaba, let's meet_

_After school at three_

            James sat there dumbstruck.  Then he came to his senses and winked at her.

            She tsked and shook her head, plainly thinking, _stupid git._

_She say, hey baby, there's one thing more_

_My school is over at a half past four_

_Maybe when we're older then we can date_

_Ooh, ooh, let's wait_

            James sat back on the stone bench, disappointed.  His first full day at Hogwarts, and he had already gotten one rejection.

            ***

            It was break time, and the first years were outside.  James and Sirius were bragging to Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin, and Davy Gudgeon about their detention.  Only that Pettigrew kid looked impressed.  All of a sudden, while James was in the middle of describing how frightening it had been to be that close to Nuray's face, Sirius grabbed his arm and pointed to the large willow tree they had noticed the night before.

            "_James_," Sirius whispered.  "I _know I saw it move this time."_

            James stopped in the middle of his sentence, Remus's face went slack, Davy Gudgeon looked excited, and Peter looked like he was about to wet himself.

            "Well, let's go investigate, shall we?" Peter finally said.

            James, Davy, and Peter began running toward the tree, but Remus stayed put.

            "Come _on_, mate," coaxed Davy, half-dragging Remus in the direction of the willow.

            "I-I really don't think that's a g-good idea," stuttered Remus.  "I m-mean, it's quite n-near the forest, and P-professor Dumbledore told us that w-was off limits…."

            "Aw, come on, Remus!  Come with us!" urged Sirius.

            "Yeah, have a little fun!" added James.

            Davy Gudgeon gave an almighty tug, and, at the risk of having his arm dislocated, Remus allowed himself to be pulled over to the tree, vowing to press the knot that would freeze it so no one would get hurt.

            "Cooooooool," breathed Sirius, gazing up at the tree.  "Let's see if it'll hit me!" he jabbed an arm out in front of the tree, and a huge branch came swinging down from above as just as he pulled it away.

            "It hits back," said James in awe.

            Remus's eyes skirted the tree frantically.  Where was that knot that the headmaster had told him about?

            Now a large number of students had gathered.  They were all placing various body parts within reach of the tree's branches, then jerking them out of the way as fast as they could.  They were making a game out of it!  A game!  Remus's brow furrowed.  Now, where _was that knot?_

            Without warning, someone cried out in pain.  Sixteen heads snapped around, sixteen mouths gasped.  The seventeenth of their number was writhing horribly on the ground, clutching the side of his face and screaming.  Sixteen faces paled.

            "Someone go get a professor!" cried a student.  The rest muttered their agreement.

            A Ravenclaw boy ran off, and moments later, Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore came rushing out of the castle and toward Davy Gudgeon, whose state was no better than before.

            "Oh, my," said Professor McGonagall.

            Dumbledore bent down to examine the wounded boy, and the rest of the students backed away created a clearing of sorts around him.

            "It's alright," he murmured, easing Davy's hand away from his face.  Now seventeen people gasped, McGonagall among them.  Dumbledore, however, did not seem surprised, though the sight that greeted him was truly one for the ages.  Davy's eye was turned sideways in its socket, bleeding like the world was ending.  "Beautiful," the headmaster commented.  "We'd best have you up to the hospital wing, Mr. Gudgeon."

            Professor McGonagall regained her composure and magicked Davy onto a stretcher, floating him slowly toward the castle.  She turned around and said loudly, "There's nothing more to see!  You have three minutes before classes resume!"

            Reluctantly, the students shuffled away.  "Mr. Potter and Mr. Black," called Professor Dumbledore.  "A word, if you will?"

            James and Sirius exchanged glances, wondering what the Headmaster wanted with them.

            "My sources tell me that you two helped initiate this," Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling.

            "But Professor," Sirius interjected, "last night at the feast, you didn't say anything about-"

            "A mistake on my part," Dumbledore replied, holding up a hand to silence him.  "When one reaches a certain age, one finds that mistakes are inevitable.  Although this was a most unfortunate one; one that could have been prevented.

            "But I must ask you boys not to go near this tree again.  It is on the grounds for one specific purpose, and, unfortunately, that purpose is not student entertainment." The headmaster's eyes twinkled again.  "I would advise your fellow students to do the same.  And-" he paused here, "don't be too hard on Remus Lupin.  He's only trying to help you."

            James and Sirius exchanged glances again, but for once in their lives, kept silent.  Finally, James spoke.  "Yes, sir, we'll do that."

            Dumbledore nodded.  "Good. Now, if I am not quite mistaken, you are about to be late for Transfiguration."  He stood up and left.

            Sirius turned to James.  "That Lupin kid- he needs some reform."

            "Quite," James agreed.  "He needs to lighten up."

            The boys nodded their heads in mutual agreement, and headed back up to the castle.

____________________________________

            AN: Uh- review please!  :D

                                                                                                --Juli


	6. The Marauders

**Ickle Firsties**

**Chapter Six – The Marauders**

**"This is _boring_," complained Sirius, leaning back on his chair and propping his feet up on the table, making sure that the annoying librarian, Madam Pince, was nowhere to be seen.  She had convicted him of this particular crime twice already.**

            James yawned and chimed in with, "I agree.  It's pointless." Peter Pettigrew eagerly nodded his agreement, and Remus Lupin caught James's yawn.  They were all that was left of the Gryffindor first year boys now.  The instant Dumbledore had owled Mrs. Gudgeon about Davy's injury, he had been removed from Hogwarts.  As they tend to do, a rumour had sprung up about the cause of his departure, and, as a result of this, James and Sirius seemed to have been given the title of school pranksters.

            Following their pact truthfully, James and Sirius had been inviting Remus to hang around with them.  The boy seemed rather bewildered by their actions, but at the same time appeared glad to have a friend.  The downside of this was that that annoying kid, Peter Pettigrew, seemed to have idolized Sirius and James and followed them around everywhere.  James and Sirius had a feeling that he was beginning to worship Remus as well.

            "There's got to be something in here _somewhere," Peter said.  __Maybe if I find it, James and Sirius and Remus will think I'm smart!_

            "There's not," James spoke up.  "We must've looked through every book in this whole library, and not a sing-"

            "Well," Remus interjected, speaking slowly and choosing his words carefully.  "Not- not _every book in the library…."_

            Sirius stared at him in mock surprise.  "No!  It can't be!  Remus is suggesting doing something against the rules!"

            "Well, should we?" asked James, rolling his eyes at Sirius, who was now pretending to have convulsions.  "I mean, if it's the only way we're going to find out about Carrion the Corny…"

            "Binns wouldn't've assigned us something that hard to find, though.  We must've overlooked it," Peter thought out loud.

            Sirius stopped having a fit and exchanged a glance with James, and James passed it on to Remus.  The three of them locked eyes and James said, "I have an idea."

Peter felt a little hurt.  Just when he was against doing something, they decided to do it!  It was as though they thought he was some kind of dork or something.

            ***

            Madam Pince picked up her wand, her cloak, and her large ring of keys.  She walked up and down the aisles of her haven as was her custom, checking for any lingering students.  Contrary to popular belief, she was not secretly a vampiress who lived in the library.  She went back to her office to sleep every Tuesday night at eleven, and came back on Wednesday mornings.

            She took one last glance around the library, and walked out of it, her cloak swooshing in the gentle magical breeze that swept through the building at night.

            ***

            "Is she gone?" Remus asked tentatively.

            "I think so," hissed James quietly.  He slid the invisibility cloak off the four of them and stood up, stretching.

            "So, Restricted Section's… that way?" asked Sirius, pointing.

            Remus held up his wand and pointed it at a large floating sign.  "What does that say, Sirius?"

            "Ress- rest- restroom?"

            "_Restricted Section_," Remus corrected him.

            "Really?  Because it still looks like restr-"

            "Just come on!" James said, pulling him forward.

            They reached the Restricted Section.  It was a large block of shelves set away from the other sections, with, of course, that distinctive sign hovering above it.  However, the four of them could sense a magical barrier- several of them, actually- blocking their path.  This was something James had never experienced before, and it scared him a little bit.  In his mind's eye, he could see many criss-crossing gold bars shimmering just in front of him, but he was sure that they weren't truly visible.  _Magical vision, a voice in his head automatically told him._

            Peter's small, watery eyes (AN: Is he related to Vernon or something?) darted around nervously.  "Maybe we should just leave," he began, but Sirius cut him off.

            "No way," he said.  "We went to all this trouble to stay, and we're not going anywhere.  Besides, we can't get out of the library.  The _Alohomora charm only works from the outside."  Seeing the look on Peter's face that very clearly said, _you belong in a mental institute, the lot of you_, Sirius grinned and continued, "I don't believe I've ever worked this hard on homework before."_

            Remus suddenly snapped his fingers.  "I know what to do!" he exclaimed.  "I saw it on the telly once-" Seeing his friends' blank looks, he said, "What?  My mum's a Muggle!  It's a kind of box that plays pictures.  Anyway, this Muggle robber had to get by something kind of like this, except the- what were they called?- lasers were red.  They just stepped over and around them and didn't get zapped.  I figure we're small enough to do something similar."

            Sirius nodded, and James said, "Okay, that's the best plan we've got, so, I'm in."

            "Me too!" Peter chirped.

            "_Shh!_"

            Remus, upon the insisting of the others, went first.  He carefully maneuvered around the first three golden bars and ducked under a fourth.  "Come on!" he mouthed to James, who had volunteered to go next.  James gingerly avoided the first few bars, and Sirius came forward.  When he had reached the fourth bar, he looked back at Peter.  He was chubby, and had already proved to be clumsy.

            "Er," said Remus, seeing the internal struggle that Sirius was going through.  "Peter, why don't you stay there, and, er, keep watch?"

            "Yes," agreed Sirius, relieved.  "Yes, we need someone to warn us if anyone's coming.  If you see someone, yell 'piggy's purple lasagna', and run for your life."

            "Piggy's purple lasagna?" asked James.  "What…?"

            "Don't ask," muttered Sirius.

            "Okay, then," said Remus, as he stepped across the very last bar.  "Hey, look- _Odd People from History: Magical and Magicked, maybe it's in there…" he lifted the heavy book off the shelf, turned to the index, and sat down as Sirius and James joined him._

            "Right, who're we looking for, again?" yawned James.  "Calliope the Cremated?"

            "Carrion," Sirius corrected him, also suppressing a yawn.  "Carrion the Corny."

            "Here we go," announced Remus.  "Carrion the Corny, page 567…." He flipped to the page and began to read aloud, "Carrion the Corny was a goblin living circa 1203 to 1365.  His name comes from the record-setting 829 corns on his right foot, all curiously shaped like…."

            James and Sirius weren't listening.  They were looking at what was on the left side of the page.  "I just don't get you two," Remus said sarcastically.  "How can anyone _possibly_ find whatever's on that page more interesting than a goblin with 829 corns on his foot?"  They didn't answer, so he leaned over to see what _was_ more interesting than a corny goblin.

            _The Marauders: Messengers to Trouble-Makers_

_            Mark Acoplyne, Harry N. Hopkins, David Gargen, and __Carlton__ Thomas were among the most fabled troublemakers of the early 17th Century.  They supposedly provided special maps to students at __Hogwarts__School__ of Witchcraft and Wizardry and later at the Ministry of Magic.  Of the seven secret passages at Hogwarts and twelve at the Ministry, five are rumoured to have been created by this motley crew._

            "Cool," Sirius breathed.  "That's awesome!  I wonder what kind of maps they made…." He trailed off, a dreamy look on his face.

            "You know," James remarked thoughtfully, "they're not a far cry from us.  We could be- I don't know, a sort of Marauder revival crew or something.  I mean, we're certainly troublemaker enough."

            "That would be entertaining," Remus thought aloud.  "We could leave a legacy for future generations of mischief-makers."

            Sirius adopted a very formal accent.  "Henceforth, we shall be known solely as the _Marauders," he said, as Peter looked on, awe-struck._

            "Can I be in it, too?" He asked.  "_Please_?"

            Sirius, Remus, and James exchanged glances.  Remus, who felt sorry for him, said, "Well, there _were_ four of them, so yeah, you can be in it."

            Sirius continued, "We are a secret organization whose one purpose is to make life more enjoyable for the students at this humble establishment.  We shall leave clues behind that only the cleverest of students can find, so that future generations will be able to get the most out of their educational experience."  Peter rose to his feet and clapped.  Sirius took a bow, and his head grazed one of the bars.

            A sapphire bar of light rose perpendicular to the one that had been disturbed and began to twirl.  It twirled so fast that all four of the boys had to look away, lest they threw up.  Thinner sapphire beams of light spiraled out from the first in all directions until the entire Restricted Section was shrouded in a bluish mist.  Then a shrill noise erupted from the centre of this confusion and rang throughout the whole library.

            "Run for it!" yelled Sirius.  "It doesn't matter if you break any more barriers now- Pringle's gonna catch us!"

            The rest of the newly dubbed Marauders obeyed.  Unfortunately, the caretaker, Apollyon Pringle, was too fast for them.  Being the gifted Seer that he was, he ran after the quartet.

            And that was how James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter got their first detentions as Marauders.

            ________________________________

            AN: Yay!  I updated quicker!!  Lol.... thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter- Sarah, Kady Rilla Wholi, Arazal, and Anne-Evans89.  Anyway, I think you all know what to do….

                                                                                                                        --Juli


	7. Lolly, Lolly, Lolly!

**Ickle Firsties**

**Chapter Seven – Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Pranks Here**

AN: If you're wondering about the chapter title, we were forced to watch 'Grammar Rock' by 'Schoolhouse Rock' in LA the other day… it was really disturbing… anyways, the adverb song (Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here) got stuck in my head.  And even though those songs scare me beyond reason, they _did give me inspiration!  ::sings:: Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your adverbs heeeeeeere…._

          **"I**'m broke," Sirius complained, turning out his pockets to reveal three Knuts and a Dungbomb.  He placed them on the table in front of him.  They were supposed to be doing their homework, but, just like the good little Marauders-in-training that they were, they were scheming instead.  Or, rather, listening to Sirius.

            "Same," said James, tossing down a Sickle.

            "Lucky you, you've got a Sickle," Remus responded, adding two Knuts to their collection.  They all turned expectantly to Peter.

            "Whaaaaaaat?" He asked, seeing the looks on their faces.  "I really _am_ broke!"  James, Sirius, and Remus rolled their eyes.

            "I don't really care if I'm broke," Remus admitted, leaning comfortably against the back of his overstuffed, squashy armchair.

            Sirius's jaw dropped, and he clutched at his chest.  "Don't _care_!  _Remus_!  I'm _ashamed_ of you!"

            Peter uttered an extremely forced laugh.  (AN: I don't care if he's too obsequious… I _like_ making him stupid!)

            "You don't want to go to Zonko's Fair?"  James asked incredulously.  Zonko's was a well known joke shop in the local wizarding village, Hogsmeade.  The Fair had been the talk of the school for about a week, and the best part was, first and second years were allowed to go, too.  Sirius and James had tried to save up their pocket money, but a fifth year Slytherin had tricked them into buying a large amount of Soaring Suckers, which James turned out to be allergic to.  So, two days before the big fair, Sirius had no money and about fifty Soaring Suckers hidden under his bed.

            "Zonko's Fair?  Well, I suppose so, but I just figured that you two would buy them out of everything.  I didn't really see the point."  Remus shrugged.

            "But it'll be fun!" James protested.  "Lots of fun!  Walking around, looking at all the stuff…."

            "Pranking the Zonko's staff!" Peter exclaimed.  As usual, everyone ignored him.

            "I suppose I'll go, but only to look around," Remus complied finally.

            "Look around?!" Sirius exclaimed, horrified.  "Why would you want to look around when you can _buy stuff_?!"

            "With what?" asked Remus.  "Didn't we just establish the fact that we're all broke?  And at least I didn't buy seventy-five Soaring Suckers from _Marvin Sweeney…."_

            Sirius reddened.  "Shut up."

            "What we need," James interjected, "is a money-making scheme."

            "Lollipops, get your pranks here!" Sirius yelled to a group of second year girls.  They turned around, saw that there was nothing of interest, and resumed working on their star charts.  James and Remus were staring at him bemusedly.  "What?" He produced a scroll from under his own chart.  "I have a whole list!"  Four feet of parchment covered in Sirius's messy, uphill scrawl fell to the floor.

            "Ah, so _that's what you were doing while we were working on our Transfiguration essays," mused Remus._

            James raised his eyebrows.  "Did you guys even hear me the first time?  We need a way to make money!  _Fast!"_

            Sirius  conjured up a lightbulb and made it float just above James' head.  Then he turned it on, and James magically began to sing.  "Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your pranks here…."

            "Wow!" Sirius exclaimed, flipping to a page in one of his books.  "The Idea Charm really _does work… hey, that's catchy!  We can sell our pranks!  Brilliant!"  He hugged __Charms for the Least Learned to his chest.  "I love Idea Charms…."_

            "Sing it again, James," urged Remus.

            "Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your pranks here… we'll sell 'em to ya cheap…." James sang.

            "Price?" Remus asked, looking to Sirius for approval.

"Two Sickles per prank, I'd say… maybe three for the more complex ones."

"Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your pranks here… we'll sell 'em to ya cheap… if you'll pay us two Sickles, we'll…" James trailed off.  "What will we do?" he asked.

"In rewards you'll reap?" suggested Sirius.

"Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your pranks here… we'll sell 'em to ya cheap… if you'll pay us two Sickles, in rewards you'll reap!"  James grinned.  "Definitely catchy."

"We can set up shop here in the common room," Remus thought aloud, grabbing a bit of parchment from Sirius's stack and beginning to write.  "Hours, maybe a half hour before breakfast and from seven to nine at night?"

"Sounds good," Sirius agreed.  Then, he added, "Make it one Sickle for early comers, the ones before breakfast."

Remus wrote for a few more minutes until he finally brandished the parchment in front of James and Sirius.

"Wow," was the only thing that they could come up with.  In the centre of the parchment was a large lollipop with a skull and crossbones on the part that you eat.  At the top of the parchment, in neat, curly script that contrasted perfectly to the skull and crossbones, it said _Pranksters for Hire, we Come Cheap!_  Under that, in a pointy, untidy hand it said: _2-3 Sickles per prank, 1 for the ones who come before breakfast.  The Prankshop is located in the Gryffindor common room.  In addition to our early hours, we are also open from 7 to 9 in the evening, same place.  Don't miss this excellent opportunity to bedazzle your friends with your cleverness and make your enemies quake with fear.  Lolly, lolly, lolly, get your pranks here!_

Peter gasped and applauded.  The other three continued to ignore him.

"That's great, Remus," James said.

"I-I had no idea you were an-an artist!" Sirius, ever the melodramatic, said.

Remus grinned.  "Thanks, but it's really no big deal.  I just had a lot of free time before Hogwarts."  He performed an Engorgement Charm on the parchment, and it grew into a good-sized poster.  A nonchalant flick from James's wand, and tiny fake fairy lights glimmered along the sides.

"I'd say we're in business, mates," Sirius said.  Little did he know….

***

_Excerpt from _Charms for the Least Learned_:_

**Idea Charms:  Though the Idea Charm is a simple, effective way to come up with a good idea, it is often with disastrous results.  The Idea Charm seems to have a mind of its own, and only works properly when it deems its idea to be for a good cause.  If this charm is used for evil or to fulfill greed, things can go drastically wrong.**

_________________________________________________

AN: Are they ever gonna get to the Fair?  If you wanna know, you have to review… go on, you know you want to!

Oh, and here is some long overdue review feedback (only those who reviewed for chapter six, though, with an exception):

**Tanya – Yup, you are!  :D**

**Jewel Valentine – Thanks!!  And thanks for putting me on your faves list, too!**

**Arazal – Mucho gracias!  You're too kind… you've reviewed for all my fanfics!  :D**

**SlippersRfuzzy – Yup, I think I updated fast enough….**

**Sarah – Heh… today in computers, I was randomly typing stuff in the "media center" section of MacMavis... I was typing random song lyrics, so I typed the lyrics to In Da Club under "Rejected from your Dream Job?  Don't Forget to Say 'Thank You!'"!  Yay!!  And me and Yadav discovered how to get negative accuracy!  I got -25400% accuracy!  :D YAY!**

**Honk4Weasley – Gracias… ::blinks:: funny?  I didn't think anyone would comment on that!  ::bows:: Thank you!**

**Padfoot 92 – That's a common misconception.  Hagrid was, in fact, well over twenty-one years of age when James and Sirius were in their first year.  He was expelled at the age of thirteen fifty years before CoS took place, which would make him sixty-six years old in book five, so he's not James's age.**

**Braney – It's okay, I forgive you… now I will turn you into my minion!  MUAHAHAHA!  No, just kidding… thanks for your faithfulness!**

**Rogue Missfit Maruader Jedi – Wow, long penname, lol… thanks so much!!  I _wish I could write more today, but I have a ton of hw… :'(_**

Thanks to all of you!!!  Now REVIEW!!!!!!!!!

                                                                                                --Juli


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